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Washington, DC -- Senator Cory Booker set several records yesterday after speaking continuously for 25 hours on the US Senate floor. His feat broke the previous record for longest speech on the Senate floor. More important to health officials, however, was his record for most the severe TDS (Trump Derangement Syndrome) case in history.
TDS expert Dr. Phil Ledbetter noted "TDS is a degenerative neurological disorder, so this was an interesting case from a medical perspective. I'll explain. Most people suffering from this affliction can only shriek impotently about Trump for 20 or 30 minutes. Even chronic TDS sufferers like Rachel Maddow can only rant illogically for about an hour or two. Since Diatribe Length is one of the metrics of TDS severity, Mr. Booker has set a record that may never be broken. You could say he won the Le Mans of TDS."
One other record was set after the speech. The Guinness Book of World Records 2025 compilation will include a new entry for "Longest Collective Yawn" awarded to the US Population for a time of 25 hours and 4 minutes.
Statistics: Posted by Panem Et Circenses — 4/2/2025, 8:50 am — Replies 0 — Views 305
